My parents have been in town and they've been oh-so-kind-and-generous (suddenly feeling like Natalie Merchant... na na na na na na na na) and have been buying us things we need for the apartment. Like new blinds to replace the ones I ruined. So Dad and The Boy went to Home Depot to have venetian blinds cut to our window's dimensions while I was at work. When I came home, and my mom came home from Education Week, she explained to me how to install the venetian blinds (since my father didn't have time to do it, even though this is what we classify as "man's work" in our family). She also explained that I can take out all the extra slats so that the blinds don't go waaaaaay below the windows, like they do in every room of my house.Cicada: So what you're saying is, I could just remove the extra slats from the venetian blind that is currently there, and that would give us excess string, and then the blinds will be able to go down the whole way down.
[at this point, we both paused to really understand the full impact of what I just said and we also pondered our combined stupidity up until that point]
Mom: That is exactly what I'm saying. [in a tone of voice that indicates that she recognizes that we're both really stupid]
Cicada: I don't suppose that we can return these blinds that we just bought.
Mom: No... your father had them cut to the right size.
Does anyone need venetian blinds that measure 24.7 inches across? Because I could really use the money to pay for that brain scan...
2 comments:
I blame myself. If I had only helped you before your parents came, this whole embarrassing incident could have been avoided. I have shortened many a blind, and made many mistakes. Now I consider myself something of a blind-shortening expert. I assumed you had already taken out the superfluous slats, so I didn't offer any suggestions, because, well, there's nothing you can do after that except live with short strings. Next time I'll not assume. And I'm sure your insurance will pay for a brain scan. Or else you could get one for free when you go up north.
hahahahaha. I'm told that copius amounts of chocolate can ameliorate blind-trimming-induced brain damage. I'll be sure to bring some over next time I'm in town.
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