Sometime this weekend, likely during or shortly after the Priesthood session of conference, my mom and I had a little chat about nothing in particular. During our conversation's meanderings, we started to talk a little bit about finishing college and moving on with life. Mom said that she was reading about the fact that more and more men are finishing up college and moving home with their parents and not moving on with their lives. Women, on the other hand, also have a tendency to move home after college, but the women who do so tend to use it as a step to becoming independent. They take that time to save money and get settled, and then they move out and on with their lives. The men just go home and settle in there, content with not being married and content with not being out on their own. Mom said that it is much like the phenomenon in Failure to Launch.
We discussed why this might be. My mom reminded me that when I was in the Young Women program, my YW president had once taught a lesson about chastity and claimed that strong sexual urges are needed because men are lazy and without the need and constant desire to have sex, they'd never get married. So she (my mom) then suggested that perhaps men are staying at home because in today's society, sex is so casual and abundant that men can have sex without taking on the responsibility of raising a family. This was an interesting theory. [My mom read this post and really wants to make sure you all understand that she said this as a joke. She doesn't want you all to think that she's stupid!] Then I asked, "What about video games? Do you think they play a role? A lot of men can just start playing a video game and that fulfills whatever it is they're looking for in life. They simply can't unplug."
The moment I said it, I clicked on a colorful little bubble and ColorJunction informed me that my game was over. You see, the entire time my mother and I were having this conversation, I was playing an online game. Don't worry---I realized right away that my statement "They simply can't unplug" was ironic.
I've been thinking about games lately. Mostly because as school stress builds up, I'm wasting more and more time playing meaningless online games. Take ColorJunction, for example. It's a tiny little game that sits on my personalized google homepage. It takes about a minute to play a full round. The problem is that then it takes you another minute to play another round and another minute to play another round, and another... well, you get the picture.
I've also been known to play Curveball, Snake, and Falldown. In fact, I have them all bookmarked. Recently, Viper sent me a link to the online version of a board game that we like to play. The board game is Carcassone. The online version is called Toulouse, because they can't infringe on copyright.
In case all that wasn't enough, once I realized I was playing lots of online games lately, I remembered Snood, the game I was addicted to my freshman and sophomore years of college. Back in those days, I got my mom addicted, too. I'd talk to her on the phone and suddenly start hearing Snood sound effects in the background. Conversations would go something like this:
Cicada: So. I think that he doesn't like me. I'm heartbroken. I mean, it just really hurts, Mom. You know? No, of course you don't know; you were married at my age. The point is, Mom, that I'm really sad and very---Mom? Was that Snood I just heard? Are you playing Snood right now???
So Snood. Yeah. It took me about thirty seconds to get readdicted.
All this leads me to wonder... Am I going to end up living in my parents' basement?
12 comments:
Don't worry too much. From personal experience, it's not that bad.
Oh wait. It is. It really is.
Snood is *wonderful*.
Wow, Cic, I never pegged you as a gamer. Next you'll be having carpal tunnel (too lazy to check spelling) surgery and staying up until all hours of the night battling online with other gamers.
It's going to be a shame, a future crying shame...
Word Verification: icfguk
I think my biggest addiction was when I was living with friends (in their basement) after my divorce. They had a Mac. The game was Bubblemania, or something like that. SO fun. I've never been able to find it for PC. If you have information, please let me know.
Anyway, once I tore myself away from that game, I moved out and got married. Let that be a lesson.
Wise words, Daltongirl. Except that I may possibly be moving into a basement, so I think that marriage is a long way off yet.
Nothing is better than crashing at the parents than to inspire you to GET OUT and be on your own. Loved living at home, loved the parents, but definately realized how nice it is to be away. Distance does make the heart grow fonder.
SNOOD rocks, I had totally forgotten about it till now. You are my hero for the day, I will have to look it up and play a round for old time sake. Take it easy for awhile, live off the rents while you can. Having your own place is expensive, and kinda boring. Good luck, and thanks for reminding me about Snood
One of the main reasons that people are going home and staying their is because parents are allowing it. Parents shouldn't be surprised when the children they insulate from adulthood never become adults.
I think another component of the problem comes from the increase in marriage age. As a country and culture, we used to get married at a younger age. Most people lived with their parents until they got married. So that trend hasn't changed, only the marrying age has changed.
Though I don't know how to put it into words, I think the first part about the difference between men and women returning home is very funny. It seems to be simply labeling the same activity as two different things. Culturally, we are fine with the idea of a woman mooching off her parents, but not a man. At least, that is the way that it seemed to read for me. I personally know more woman who live with their parents than I do men.
Next, I think video games are as much a problem as TV, sports, education, reading books. For some reason we have as a nation decided that there is something bad about video games. This belief is completely unfounded and actually flies in the face of extensive research showing definite cognitive benefits from playing video games. I like to play video games because I find that it is a very good form of recreation. Many people like to watch TV. TV does little to stimulate the mind or provide any sort of benefit to the viewer. But for some reason, the average person thinks video games are worse than TV.
All this said though, I am alarmed by my generation's unwillingness to take responsibility. With all of the baby boomers retiring, it is imperative that we step up to the plate and assume responsibility for the world. But many Americans are unwilling to do so.
I love me some Bejeweled. Which is not to be confused with the Bedazzler. I have Bejeweled on my cellphone and I play it when I'm giving an exam. That way, my students never know when I'm going to look up and catch their lazy butts cheating.
can i move in with if you do go back to the parents' basement?
Ooooh! I *love* Snood--I mean, I'm so sorry he didn't love you. But now you have Viper, and that's much better.
My current favorite, though, is Zuma.
Snood rocks my world!
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