A Pound of Flesh

I lost a pound this week.

I'm actually quite proud of my performance this week. I ate sensibly every day, and I even made it out to the gym on four different days. Two days I worked out for 45 minutes and two days I worked out for 90 minutes (those were the days that I brought 24 with me to the gym).

On Saturday, I expressed frustration that I hadn't lost much weight. I mean, I know that one doesn't lose weight immediately, but it is still disappointing when you know that you've worked hard all week and you see 174 on the scale instead of 175.

So I talked to Brother 2. Then he explained to me that I'm doing well. He said that if you lose more than a pound a week, then that means that you're losing weight by starvation. This means that your body is keeping the fat and eating muscle and ... oh, I can't remember what else. Brain tissue, I'm sure. Oh---no---water weight. So he explained how many calories it takes to eat a pound of fat and how many calories it takes to eat a pound of muscle. The point is that I'm doing well. It means that I have to revise my goal of losing 35 lbs. I'll be 35 lbs less heavy in seven months, not in four. I'm okay with this.

What was interesting was my trip to Subway today. I was very short on time today, and one can only bring so many frozen dinners with oneself during a day, so after work I went to Subway to get myself a dinner. Of course, as far as fast food goes, my opinion is that Subway has got the market in low-fat, low-cal eating. Jared has done his part to inspire us all to get off our couches and make it out to Subway. They accomodate us with a menu of 6 sandwiches under 6 grams of fat. They'd expand this menu, but the more sandwiches they offer, the less low-fat they'd be: 47 sandwiches under 47 grams of fat. Well, they may as well be a McDonalds at that point.

So my point is that all their advertising targets those who need food fast, but want to lose weight. They lure dieters into their store with promises of healthy choices, promises of delicious food that will help weight loss.

And then the starving dieters get to the cash register.

And in front of the cash register there is a display of cookies.

And the advertising on the cookie display says, "Come on. Just one won't hurt."

In other news, Alcoholics Anonymous has started serving complimentary shots before meetings.

16 comments:

Nemesis said...

Brother 2 is totally right about the weightloss thing. That's why you don't want to go UNDER 1500 calories, because you'll lose that hard-earned muscle first, and that would be a sad story.

Please understand, though, that I am in no position to tell anyone what do do, since I'll I've eaten today is a bowl of cereal, an apple, and (in about 2 minutes) a candy bar.

Also, GO YOU!!!!

Braden said...

Whoa, I thought the picture was supposed to be rotting flesh. Yikes.

Braden said...

(How appropriate that my validation word was "egorr." Braaiins.)

daltongirl said...

Cigarette machines in the hospital.

Dentists who hand out candy.

Computer companies who give you a printer for practically free (stock ink cartridges are only half full), and then charge you twice as much as the printer is worth to buy new cartridges.

Churches who have big Halloween parties and decorate the rooms with ghouls and demons and stuff.

Dead Colonels who put an addictive chemical in their chicken, causing you to crave it fortnightly!

Why should Subway be the only one with ethics?

It's time you learned that it's all a big conspiracy. John Birch Society members, unite!

daltongirl said...

Well done on the lost pound, by the way. I think I may have been the one who found it.

daltongirl said...

It did look delicious, until Bawb said it was rotting flesh. Then it made me want to puke.

Cicada said...

Actually, I succumbed. I ate the cookie. And you know what? It was crap. Absolute crap. It was thin and not very delicious at all. Later, I looked up the nutritional info online. It says that for one subway cookie like that, it's something like 10 grams of fat. So let's think about this. They lure you in by saying that there are 6 subs with 6 grams of fat or less and then they tell you that one cookie won't hurt? When that one cookie has more fat than your sandwich? Sick and wrong.

If you want GOOD cookies, I suggest the Smart Cookie. They basically make the best cookies of anyone in the whole world. And I would know.

Limon said...

They really put that on the signs? So sad. So very sad.
Thanks for being an inspiration to all of us who need a little help getting to the gym. You deserve a prize. How about a lard patty? Come on, just one won't hurt.

ambrosia ananas said...

Nice work.

Cricket said...

Congrats on the good week! If you can eat sensibly all week, then you've already beaten more than half the battle!! (that's my biggest downfall)

BTW: My mom used to attend Weight Watchers meetings at the location between a pizza shop and a Jack-in-the-Box.

JB said...

That's hilariously true! It's so cruel to have those cookies sitting there taunting me. Right next to the chips--some of which are healthy. They're big cookies too! Glad to hear they don't taste that good. Maybe I'll be less tempted next time. Maaybe...

I used to go get ice cream at a Baskin Robins whose sitting room window faced the stationary bikes at 24 hour fitness. I thought that was an awesome irony. The people eating ice cream may be worrying that they should be working out and the working out-ers are getting taunted with ice cream. 31 flavors of ice cream. [evil laugh]

redlaw said...

"shots before meetings"

Tee Hee Hee (I don't really laugh like that but I don't know how to spell my laugh)

This was a funny post and i can so relate - my scale at home has either become my best friend or my worst enemy depending on what it tells me - and try 12 weeks of losing no weight whatsoever even though you're only eating rabbit food...now that, my friend, sucks.

Sara said...

Glad we don't "rot" our flesh away...it's got to much safer to merely "lose" it. :) Although, rotting it away might be faster...ugh. Hope that doesn't leave too many nasty images...

stupidramblings said...

Next time you eat at the Bombay House, remember that the main ingredient besides flour in the roti is lard. Pure, unadulterated lard. Sure, they call it 'ghee,' but that's just a fancy Hindi word for lard.

Still, I bet it's better for you than white bread...

(word verification: etjzh--which is the correct spelling for a sneeze.)

Tolkien Boy said...

And now I'm craving cookies. Do you know how hard cookies are to find at 12:30 at night?

daltongirl said...

Don't eat at Bombay House anymore. Instead, drop by there on your way here, and pick up one of those little bottles of anise seed and candies that they give you after dinner. Then come where you can eat Indian food without ghee. I use butter.

My house still smells like curry from the other night. I've made lasagna, chili, cornbread, and burned pumpkin candles, and it still smells overpoweringly of curry when you walk in the door. It's yummy.