Because I'm famous and you're not.

A couple months ago, I signed up to blogpatrol. Mostly I did it because I was jealous of Master FOB, Th, and Nemesis who seemed to know what keywords people used to access their blogs. I wanted to know what keywords people were using to find mine! So I signed up to blogpatrol. I have noticed that many of you have as well.

Before I move on to what's really interesting, let me share what people have googled to find my blog:

  • I had a threesome (I did... but not like that!)
  • I slept with my brother (Nope... never did this one... but someone was seeking for validation on my blog apparently.)
  • BYU gay find (If they're playing a game of hot and cold, I'd say, "warmer, warmer, but not there yet!")
  • phyllo-wrapped brie recipe (I am better than a recipe book.)
  • spring board diving (they're getting more than they bargained for...)
  • cicada (they're getting less than they bargained for...)

Now on to why I'm famous and you're not. So I also keep track of pages visited. Of course, the page most frequently visited is, but then other pages spike when one of you, my wonderful friends and readers, reference one of my stories in your posts. It amuses me to no end to be able to see how many people are actually clicking over from your story to find out what I had to say about it first. Thank you.

Sometimes there are anomalies. Like today. For some reason, Family Slide Show was being viewed more than any other page (other than This was strange to me since I have been keeping up on all of your blogs (even though I don't always comment) and I was sure that none of you had referenced this post recently.

So I went to my referrers page, which is another one of my favorites. I get to see where people link to my blog. For example, if people read something on Nemesis's blog and then link from hers to mine, Nemesis gets a referral point. The referral page also helps me tabulate how much I owe to whom for Christmas. If present value were to be based on referral value, Melyngoch would be receiving eleven pairs of fish net stockings from me. It baffles me that she's my top referrer since she's so new to the blogging world.

Normally, I recognize every name on the top referrers list. But today, there was an anomalous one: This was interesting to me, since recently someone googled "South Porcupine" and found me. So I clicked the link. It is, by the way, the community of South Porcupine's official site. This particular link leads you to some "Internet lessons." It then explains what blogging is and says, "To see examples of blogs:" then you find the hyperlinked text, "A former resident of South Porcupine." It links to my Family Slide Show.

I'm still laughing about this. I have now become the blogging world's representative of South Porcupine. I now have a weighty responsibility. You, my readers also have a responsibility. That responsibility is to be sensitive to Canadians. No racist comments here, please. Let this post be a marker of our renewal of our committment to be culturally sensitive. Let diversity thrive. If not, I'll club you with my hockey stick and sic my pet pylon on you, you hoser.

(For those who would like to try out blogpatrol, too:


JB said...

Blogpatrol didn't want to let me on today. I changed my password fine and then it gave me the login screen and said my login id or password was wrong and I put in the new one and it wouldn't let me in still...anyway, I was not happy with them today and it's funny you would blog about it! :)

Also, Melyngoch refers to you as her "almost totally non-sexual crush." Maybe that piques people's interest?

Nemesis said...

You do realize with the plead for Canadian tolerance that you're pretty much waving a red flag in front of Savvymom, right?

And yay for all the times you mentioned me! Maybe I'll get some hits out of this!

Master Fob said...

I'm always sensitive, eh?

Tolkien Boy said...

Maybe I should get on this blogpatrol, but I think I'd be nervous to know where people are coming from.

I ONLY log onto your site from very clean sources. Honest.

Squirrel Boy said...

I get random referrals from poker sites. I have absolutely no idea why a poker site would have a link to my site. Whenever I try to trace them back, I can't find any actual links to my site.

Maybe it's an insidious and subtle new form of spam to try to get me to spend money on poker sites.

Th. said...


The last time I checked my referrals, the most recent one was from an Indian porn site. I don't know what to think about this.

The site was hosted by blogger, so I'm sure it was just someone hitting the Next Blog button, but still. Who needs horny Indians?

Or, for that matter, horny Canadians?

Actually, I have never met a Canadian I didn't like. My first kiss was with a Canadian and a shocking number of my FBFs are from Lethbridge.

Incidentally, to make things crerpy, over the weekend I dreamed there was a war at Wal*Mart and that you handed me love notes. I never got to read them because I was too busy keeping them hidden from Lady Steed.

So knock that off!


daltongirl said...

I'm a loser. I went on blogpatrol to find out if I'm famous too, and the only "interesting" thing I got was that most of my viewers use a screen resolution of 1024x768.

On the other hand, there's good news for you and Nemesis. Looks like you're in line for a pret-ty sweet Christmas present from me, since you're currently winning the referral race.

Cicada said...


That is really weird in a very funny sort of way. Of course, I always assumed you knew that all my blog posts were coded love messages to you...

ambrosia ananas said...

Those darn Canad--I mean, canned Ians. You know, I just can't stand people named Ian. Ummm. Leaving now.

daltongirl said...

I laughed hysterically over your eighth link, btw. Partly because when the link came up, it said "Crazy Woman" in big ol' letters.

Where is Crazywoman, anyway, and why have we not heard from her on this matter? Is she searching her dictionary for good words? Maybe she's busy cleaning up broken glass and catsup.

Cicada said...


Yes, the CRAZY WOMAN is a perfect touch and completely unplanned. I have also wondered why she hasn't commented on this yet... as Nem pointed out, I was basically waving a red flag in front of her...

Savvymom said...

And maybe YOU are discriminating against United States of American blonde people.

Cicada said...

Ouch, Savvy. Geez, you said you responded, but that was low! Feeling particularly pregnant today? (little boobs, little boobs, little boobs)