One Wild Ride

Why is it that I have so many biking adventures?
Yesterday, I got all dressed up to go to work. I put on a long skirt, a shirt, a little fleece-lined jacket, and my red rabbit-fur hat. Then, I was stupid enough to spend about 45 seconds shooting off an email to Nemesis, Daltongirl, and Sahkmet. I wasn't even saying anything important. But then I hurried out to the bus stop and missed the bus by 15 seconds. Drat.

I didn't want to wait for the next bus. I REALLY didn't want to wait for the next bus. And, of course, because I've been eating well and exercising, then I was full of energy and love of life. I remembered that the few times I biked to work this summer, I wore different clothes so that I could change out of them and into something professional, but I dismissed that thought, thinking that surely I wouldn't sweat. Afterall, it was all downhill.

So I got on my bike and started pedalling. In my long skirt. And my red rabbit fur hat. And my aviator sunglasses. I'm sure I looked like I took my sport fashionably, if not seriously.

The problem was that apparently, it was all downhill from where I used to live. It is not all downhill from where I currenly live. I think it was slightly uphill. So I was exerting a little more effort than I had thought I would. And the inside of my hat is leather.

I also hadn't taken into account that there's currenly construction on the highway I was riding down. I suppose one doesn't really notice these things when one rides the bus every day and doesn't have to navigate construction. Normally it's scary enough to drive on the highway's one-foot shoulder. But the pylons (that's road cones to you Americans) indicated that all traffic had to move to the left. Following the pylons, and therefore the law, I ended up riding in the left-hand lane with all of the regular highway traffic. Of course, there was absolutely nothing going on to the right side of the pylons. It was just regular highway that was sectioned off, and the contruction was taking place on about 1/25 of the space that was sectioned off. I started to consider riding on the right side of the pylons, but one never knows why it's been sectioned off. I ran the risk of driving over land mines.

When the risk of being run over by a car finally seemed to outweigh my risk of running over a land mine, I started driving to the right of the pylons, or in the construction (land mine) zone.

Of course, since to the right of the pylons I was not where I was supposed to be and to the left of the pylons, I was in serious danger of getting run over, I started pedalling as fast as I possibly could. So much for my leisurely ride to work.

When I finally got to work, I was covered in sweat. I took off my leather hat and not surprisingly, my entire head of hair was soaked. Sick. At least everyone at work thought that I just got out of the shower...

Four hours later, I didn't want to ride the bike back home, so I decided that I'd take it on the bus. My regular bus driver (who is nice and shmoozy with all the other regulars but had yet to recognize me as a regular passenger) pulled to the side of the road and I poked my head in the door to indicate that I had no idea how to attach my bike to the front of the bus. A helpful man came out to do it for me and teach me how. When I got on the bus after the bike was secured, the bus driver said to me, "What did you do to your hair??" I said, "I dyed it red... and... uh... rabbit." And then I got a crush on him.

And thus concludes my biking adventure yesterday.

Unless, of course, you count the part that I rode the bus to school so that I could work on a project in the computer lab, and several hours later, I walked home and it was really cold out and I wished that there had been a way to get home faster... and then I realized that the bike was still parked at school. And there it remains.

22 comments:

Limon said...

wait--did he think that the rabbit fur hat was your hair? or did your hair turn red from the sweat? or what?

daltongirl said...

Okay, I mean absolutely no offense by this, but I can not figure that photo out. I mean, it looks like your face is made out of Silly Putty or something. Is that because of all the weight you've lost? Because you didn't look like Silly Putty Face the last time I saw you.

Maybe it's the lighting.

Cicada said...

Limon--I should have clarified. I was wearing my hat again. He knew that the hat wasn't my hair so he was teasing me. But the hat DOES look like hair until you see it close up.

DG--I did some photoshop effects to it to make it look cool and more fun than just the regular photo... This particular effect isn't called "Silly Putty," but I suppose it could be!

ambrosia ananas said...

I like your rabitified hair. Nice pics. : )

daltongirl said...

Okay, well, I'm glad you didn't go have plastic surgery or anything. Also, I never got any 45 second email from you yesterday. Where's my email? I want it real bad!

Stupidramblings said...

I'm starting to value my car a little more now. My car is in serious danger of veering of the road at any moment; I wish I could say I am afraid of the land mines, but I know my car will veer left when it goes.

I just know it.

Wanna buy a Saturn?...

Squirrel Boy said...

Random story for you, Cicada: On the radio this morning they had a guy from Crazy Canucks come in and talk about all the great things you could get there. It made me think of you. But mostly it made me want a Wunderbar.

JB said...

Pylons? Really? Like python+nylon? Why? They look pretty cone shaped to me...

Sorry you left your bike at school! That so sucks...

And your hat's cool.

Mary said...

Am I the only person here that was blown away by the professional visual aid constructed? Truly, I would have been lost in this story without it. The meticulous placement of the land mines, the color coding. Well done.
Seriously, what program allows you to construct such things?

JB said...

Oh yeah. I meant to say something aboot that. Good on yer!

Cicada said...

Thanks for noticing my professional visual! I am somewhat of an artiste, you know. I made this in Paint. The last time I told a bike story, I made a visual, and Cooper commented that without it, he would have been lost. Although this speaks well for my Paint skills, it means that my writing skills leave something to be desired... But I'm happy to at least have good Paint skills!

Mary said...

Oh, not at all darling. It simply means Cooper and I have short attention spans. Well, I do at least.

metamorphose said...

Yowzers! Sexy cicada pic!

And your road visual is very impressive. I'm wowed by your skills.

Savvymom said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Savvymom said...

I meant to say, it doesn't recognize it as a road cone.

Savvymom said...

Pylon is a stupid word. And websters dictionary doesn't recognize it in case you were wondering.

Pylon-
A steel tower supporting high-tension wires.
A tower marking a turning point in a race among aircraft.
A large structure or group of structures marking an entrance or approach.
A monumental gateway in the form of a pair of truncated pyramids serving as the entrance to an ancient Egyptian temple.

Main Entry: py·lon
Pronunciation: 'pI-"län, -l&n
Function: noun
: a simple temporary artificial leg

Cicada said...

SM- Yeah, I know. I looked it up in Webster's, too. I'm well aware of their definitions. But just because you were raised a different way than I was, that doesn't make what I do or say "stupid." Geez, Savvy. You'd think your parents would have taught you a little something about communicating politely with people of different cultures... Now what would happen to your dear sister if she went around England telling people that the things they do or say are "stupid"? They'd all club her to death. Or at least ceroc her to death.

Of course, I won't club you or try to harm you. I may poke your belly really hard the next time I see you, though, so as to take my anger out on your unborn child. I'm dangerous like that.

Savvymom said...

You should poke my belly. Seriously. Then you can see why we call him "lurch the octopus". He totally freaks out when someone touches him. Some people.
And maybe I will sign myself up for some sensitivity training class....

Tolkien Boy said...

Your lucky red hat didn't work...I failed the test.

However, the tactile sensation was more than worth the lost points. I hope you wear it again soon.

JB said...

Death by ceroc'ing, eh? If I got to choose the way I die, that would be on the list.

Stupidramblings said...

Cicada:

I have answered your question you posted earlier this week. I'm sorry I hadn't seen it, but you can find my response here: Ask Stupid: 10. Medusa? No, Seduce Ya.

DP said...

I used to think that the word pylon was derived from what you do with the things: "pile on." But the origin is, in fact, Greek.

And Cicada, I like your graphic, too. I couldn't have done better even with sophisticated GIS software. Isn't it nice to see them providing a whole mile-long buffer zone for our poor, defenseless construction workers while nonetheless remaining indifferent to the plight of the student employees who have to cross the highway on foot daily?