More on Biking (Moron Biking)

Three choice biking experiences from my trip home yesterday:

1. On the trails, I saw Rachel ahead of me, walking her two chihuahuas. She was walking the same direction I was biking, so she didn't see me. I decided to ring my bell and thought she's for sure realize it was me because we go biking together and she knows I take those trails. Instead of turning around, she moved slightly over to let me pass. You have to understand that there was already more than enough room for me to pass her without her having to move at all. So I started ringing my bell non-stop as I bore down on her. Finally, when I got up almost next to her, she and her dogs were so far off the trail, they were almost wading in the stream. She never once turned around to look at me, so I yelled, "Move it or lose it!" Then I stopped the bike beside her and she realized it was me. Then she told me she thought I was a real b!tch. It really was a tender moment.

2. Ten seconds after Rachel and I parted ways, I heard a barking sort of bird in the bushes. I didn't know what kind of bird it was but I had to know. So I walked my bike down the very steep, precarious sand embankment and wandered off into the bushes. I didn't find the bird. But when I brought my bike back to the very steep, precarious sand embankment, I wondered how I was possibly going to get back up with my platform sandals, heavy bike, and business casual attire. Although the embankment was only about five feet, it took me forever to inch my way up. What finally motivated me to move the last couple of feet was my pride---an approaching man heard my feeble dinging bell (and probably wondered what kind of bird it was) and offered help, but I was too embarrassed to accept. I made it back up before he finally reached me.

3. Nat called. Expecting it to be an emergency (i.e. she was in a store about to make a purchase and needed to approve it through me), I answered. It wasn't an emergency (she was at home and was calling so that I could approve purchases she already made). And I biked a good mile while talking to her on the phone. If talking on the phone while driving is dangerous, how dangerous is talking on the phone while biking? Nat said it was probably less dangerous: The chance of you getting into an accident is greater, but the severity of the accident is likely to be much less than a car accident because your vehicle is lighter and you're going much slower. For added safety, every so often I would said, "Nat! I need both hands, just a second!" and I would use both hands on the handlebars to navigate the more tricky parts.

Those three events kindof prove to me that I may just be a Moron biker.

4 comments:

Squirrel Boy said...

Just please don't start applying make-up while you bike.

Rachel said...

Oh my gosh, I was SO ANNOYED at that annoying woman who was trying to run me off the road! (Of course it subsided once I realized it was you and had a good laugh over it.) My dogs were probably like, WTF we're already up to our armpits in weeds!

After we parted there was a small snake slithering across the path in front of me. I accidentally stepped on the tip of Roxy's paw when I screamed and jumped to get away. I should have sprayed the snake with my mace!

brinestone said...

Or maybe you're just a Mormon biker. . . .

natali said...

i only like to call during good times for you. like when you are sleeping. or on a date. or biking. i am good like that.