Tonight at Nat's house, she introduced me to all her friends as, "This is Cicada. She met her boyfriend on the internet." I think that maybe she's trying to get me used to the fact that now that Murray and I are dating-dating, people are going to ask us how we met, and I'm going to have to admit that we met online. Actually, everyone I met tonight really thought it was cool that Murray and I met through my blog. And my grandpa up in Canada, who thinks that computers are of the devil, said, "You know, people don't like to admit that they met on the internet because there's some sort of stigma attached to it. But it's really not much different than my day when we went to dances to meet friends of friends. That's how we met new people to date."
If Grandpa doesn't think it's so bad, why should I?
If Murray doesn't think it's so bad, why should I? (He made this horrible fake-crying face when I told him that the way we met embarrasses me, and it almost broke my heart.)
In fact, I have several successfully-married friends who met online (whoa---not that we're talking about marriage here---we're just talking about the fact that Murray and I are dating, okay?). Should I out you all? Off the top of my head, there's Daltongirl and Daltonboy, Squirrel Boy and Brinestone, and Ambrosia and Bawb. I don't know if three couples counts as "several" but you get what I'm saying.
Still, I'm embarrassed to say, "Murray and I met on the internet." That sounds like internet dating sites (not that there's anything wrong with that...). I'm even embarrassed to say, "Murray and I met through my blog" because that generally leads to "What is your blog address" and maybe I don't want to give my blog address to everyone I talk to about Murray.
I'm going to have to come up with some alternate explanations of how we met. Some can be half truths. Some may be lies. Let me know which is your favorite, and feel free to suggest alternatives.
1. We met through a friend of a friend. (True: He linked to my blog from the blog of a friend of a friend.)
2. Well, we were dating for a while, then we broke up, but we got back together again. (This is El Senor's solution. He said we just have to break up at some point and get back together again. This answer is "deflection" where I wouldn't actually be answering the question, but people wouldn't notice that I wasn't actually answering the question.)
3. We happened to go to the same restaurant one night and started talking while we waited to be seated, and decided to sit together. (True: Although, we arranged online to meet at that restaurant... I'd just omit that detail.)
4. We met in the Mac store and our love of Macs brought us together. (False. But we both love Macs.)
5. I saw him on the street and recognized him as a boy from a James Christensen painting who I had always dreamed of meeting. (False. But he's in a James Christensen painting.)
6. I saw him on the street and recognized him as a guy in Saints and Soldiers. (False, but he was an extra in Saints and Soldiers.)
7. We were both abducted by aliens at the same time and met on the mother ship. When we returned to earth, we found each other and our shared horrifying experience really brought us closer together. (True, but claiming to have met on the internet is much less embarrassing.)
23 comments:
I think it's really cool that you met through your blog. You can add to your list of people who met online Queen Zippergut and her British husband (as opposed to her French and Chinese husbands), who met via some dating service.
Also, I notice that one of the tags on this post is "Facetious." Do you find it very useful to have a tag that applies to every post on your blog?
Mr. Fob, I can't believe that you would imply that all my posts are facetious. I find some to be quite serious. Actually, it's a tag that I apply when I want to be really sure that people know that I'm just kidding. But a label called j/k seemed kindof lame since I never use that in chatting.
Anyway. I don't know Queen Zippergut personally, though I've often heard about her. So I can't really add her to my list. It's a pity... I really need to compile a list that's more convincing than three couples.
I would just say you met through your blog, but then I'm having trouble imagining who I wouldn't want to know about my blog. I didn't really want my mom to find mine, but she has, and now apparently my computer-illiterate grandparents know about it too. Aside from them, I don't care who reads it. But maybe you only want friends and family reading yours. Besides, if someone I wasn't great friends with told me their blog address, I'd probably forget it instantly anyway. Oh, maybe your boss shouldn't know the address. Okay, I did think of one. Tell him you met through a friend of a friend.
(When I didn't want to explain, I used to tell people that Jon Boy and I met at Brick Oven. But then they'd ask whether we just happened to be there at the same time, and I'd have to explain the whole story. Eventually I realized it was messier to dodge the issue than to deal with it straight up.)
I don't think there's anything wrong with saying you met through your blog... Technically you and I met through your blog although it would be more accurate to say we met through a friend--but still. ;)
It's really a question of motive. When you sign up on a dating site, your motive is to get a date. When you blog, you're just there for fun and if somebody realizes how cool you are and asks you out, there's absolutely no shame in it.
Date on, Cicada. Date on.
"It's a long and complicated story" is a great answer. People who don't know you well will be afraid to ask more since you're apparently not willing to share it all by yourself.
So what James Christensen painting is he in?
I like the Mac explanation. No further reasoning necessary. Anyone in the know will simply nod and say "Ohhhh, yes of course. That's how I met my husband/wife/lovah/partner/roommate/best friend/counterpart too!"
And if they don't immediately understand, clearly they are PC users, and you don't particularly want to be friends with them anyway.
You know, my sister is dating a guy who saw on LDS Linkup that she had served her mission in Rochester NY. He had a friend who had served there and so he emailed my sister, asked if he knew the sister, and low and behold, my sister had trained the girl and had heard of this guy... Now they're dating. Now... if you had met through LDS Singles or something like that, I would be slightly embarrassed. But you didn't so lucky you!
oh great now how am i supposed to introduce you if cicada met her bf on the internet is out.
This is funny because when people ask me how I know you I say, "Through her blog."
Among my friends it's weirder to say that we met working as editors. I wouldn't want them to think I had a dorky job. Blogging is hot.
Along the same lines, saying you met in the Mac store is probably more nerdy than the blog thing.
You could just say you met through A blog. You don't have to be specific. Then you can move on to how you thought one another witty and charming and move the conversation toward dishing about your new bf, which is really all anyone wants to talk about anyway.
I had that same thing--feeling very odd that I met my friend through the internet. Like I was a big, stinking loser who, well, not to offend anyone who does internet dating sites, but they've never actually floated MY boat. If you know what I mean.
When people ask me how we met, who don't know him or me very well, I usually say that we met through a mutual friend.
But, when I tell friends of mine of how we really met, they usually say, "What's Craigslist?" I probably butchered this post with too many commas used incorrectly, but it's late and I really don't care right now. :)
What? No! You can't tell people that about us! [covers face in shame]
I tell most people that we met at BYU. If they're interested enough to ask more questions, I explain the Board.
I'm glad your grandpa is so commonsensical about it.
i dont understand the shame. i think meeting on the internet is hands down the best way to meet someone.
I vote telling a whopping lie. Then you will have a great story later. You can tell everyone something diffferent, so no one will REALLY know.
If you want real shame try telling people that your husband/bf/whatever picked you up in a night club. I wish I could say online with the looks I get.
meeting online is the only thing that makes sense in our generation. the internet has taken over. its not shame its just situational.
oh and the nightclub thing is great. only a bar is better.
Thanks all for your input. I think my heart broke again when Murray said last night that he's sorry that I'm embarrassed about how we met. I really should just embrace the truth.
Or I could embrace lies. Like it might be kindof fun to tell people that I was a mail-order bride from NorthernOntarioBrides.com.
Last night Murray and I met a couple who met on the internet, too (LDS Linkup). They met IRL (I hate myself for even typing that) a month ago and they're getting married tomorrow. It makes me feel like Murray and I are way behind. Really, why waste months and months dating when you can just get married?
What's everyone doing next week? Want to come to my wedding?
One month and the wedding is tomorrow? GET OUT.
I knew a guy and girl from Institute who had gone on 5 dates--and decided to get married. I think the 5 dates were in like a one week period.
I vote for saying that you met through a friend. Because the internet can be a good, good friend, right?
Hey there's no shame in finding a date online! Wheeeee!
I love though that you met through your blog. Pretty cool.
I see nothing wrong with having met through the Internet.
If you do wish to avoid the subject, I suggest that you tell them that you first met in the pre-mortal world, and your Heavenly Father helped you remember in a most miraculous way, but the experience is just too sacred to share at this time.
*raises hand slowly*
I met my husband online too.
And just like Ambrosia, I tell people we met at BYU. It's technically correct, but the story is much more involved. I wouldn't even mind saying 'online' but then people assume an online dating service when, in fact, it was much, much nerdier. Leave the detailed story for dinner parties and close friends, that's my vote.
Well, I met my boy through my blog too. A mutual friend linked to my blog on her blog and he started reading my blog and thought I was awesome. Sometimes I say we met through a mutual friend. It's just easier and usually no one needs further details.
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