This Laptop Will Self-Destruct...

...in four years, two months, and two days.

Captain Fabuloso and Captain Mom met during their law school orientation. Captain Fabuloso was on crutches, Captain Mom offered to help him carry around his books. I wasn't there for it, but I am sure that they were excited as they got to know each other and discovered how much they had in common. Most important of all these common characteristics, I'm sure, were their twin laptops from Dell. Back then, $3000 could buy you a black laptop, weighing a mere twenty pounds, with a mighty four-gig hard drive.*

Captain Fabuloso and Captain Mom eventually married. They've kept their computers and used them until this weekend. On Sunday, October 29th, Captain Fabuloso's laptop died. On Tuesday, October 31st, Captain Mom's laptop died.

I'm sure a lot of other creepy things happen on Halloween, but the death of two identical laptops within two days of each other? I smell a Dell conspiracy.

Unfortunately, my Dell conspiracy theory doesn't survive the hard evidence that Captain Fabuloso's computer actually died because he dropped it. Still... it's just too perfect....




*This is an exaggeration. Though I don't know the specs of their computers, I'd say they weighed about ten pounds or more each and had twenty-gig hard drives.

12 comments:

Unknown said...

I'm guessing Captain Mom's laptop killed itself because it couldn't bear to go on without a mate.

*moment of silence*

stupidramblings said...

squirrel boy makes a good point, and the comment I had planned in my head before reading it somehow isn't as funny anymore.

So...Ditto squirrel boy...Ditto.

kellyroxanne said...

i have to say that i almost was responsible for the early death of captain fabuloso's laptop. i was using it and someone was tickling me and i almost threw it on the ground. luckily, it was able to live to a ripe old age.

Cicada said...

I'd like to take this moment to clarify that the "someone" who kellyroxanne is referring to was not Captain Fabuloso and it was not me. It was El Senor. So please don't think it was adulterous tickling or lesbian tickling.

Thank you.

Mrs. Hass-Bark said...

creeeeeepy

Th. said...

.

Haw many gigs to the ounce these days anyway?

B-rad said...

So would dropping it accidentally constitute Involuntarily Compu-slaughter?
Leave it to me to take a running joke and push it so far that I kill it.

I like the new look of your blog, but I also kinda miss the old one. I'm torn? are you?

n said...

after recently moving in to the killer dell laptop house i was afraid their bad luck would rub off on me. this old 24 pound laptop is all i have left...

daltongirl said...

Do you think it's a coincidence that within one week of the deaths of those laptops, I acquired a brand-new one of my own?

And I used to think reincarnation was a crock . . .

Lane said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
provoce said...

I'm surprised I didn't hear more about this tragic loss yesterday. I knew the Fabuloso had dropped his laptop, but I didn't know Cpt Mom's had died, too. Sad.

n said...

in case anyone was wondering, my laptop died. it probably just saw captain mom's and captain fauloso's laptops laying there and thought, why am i not doing that?